Two month old signing milk?

Okay, its likely that I'm over reacting, but twice (for sure, and once unsure) since yesterday evening, we've seen Nisarg opening and closing his fist deliberately - the sign for milk. Both times I responded by offering to feed him, and he was hungry and fed well.

I show him the baby signing time video often because its bright and has music and stuff. He enjoys the music, and watches on and off. I had never thought he was paying attention. Perhaps he isn't. I also do the sign for milk while I'm feeding him. That is something he definitely notices, as he is always looking intently at me as he feeds. I think he has realized that the sign for milk is accompanied by or followed by a feed.

Now, the question is if this is a coincidence or deliberate?

Everything I've read about baby sign language indicates that babies don't start signing till they are 6 months old, as they don't have that kind of coordination till then. On the other hand, Nisarg is definitely opening and closing his hands when he is hungry. It is not a very proper opening and closing - more like an uncurling of his fingers and curling back - neither does he make a proper fist, nor does he make his fingers completely straight.

It is quite likely that I'm imagining things.

On the other hand, a friend who runs a developmental toys library made an insightful comment when I told her about Nisarg letting me know when he wants to pee. She said, "They are telling us a great many things all through. It is about how observant and intuitive we are." She thought it was a sign of my sensitivity and attention that I picked up his cues and we had a day without wetting a single diaper.

So I like to think that Nisarg is making the sign for milk. Whether he is actually trying to tell me, or simply hungry and remembers that sign as associated with feeding, I don't know. He does it quite absently, like he is when he is talking to himself. As opposed to when he coos to us. So I think maybe he remembers the sign when he is hungry, without actually signing for us as such.

I'll try to shoot a video and post it here, and you guys can tell me what you think.

Update: I tried this time when he did it, and he got distracted and started interacting with me.... So no go. Will try again when he does it.

Tips to help baby crawl

Okay, so your baby is still not crawling. Maybe he's 5 months old, or just born..... we are all eager to see them crawl.

Okay, the first thing to realize is that a newborn put on the mother's stomach will crawl up to suckle (often, if not mostly). So crawling is not that big a difficulty. However, if you are talking about crawling to actually get somewhere significant.... you're going to soon wish he was getting into less things, but hey, here are some tips anyway.

1. Put baby on stomach when awake. Really, there is no such thing as too much. Reassure, comfort, pick up, whatever, but if you're putting the baby down awake, its the stomach that must be down. Really, a baby on the back is rather like a turtle on its shell. How will any crawling happen? Its definitely a learning by doing thing, and doing needs opportunity.
2. Be excited about it: Be thrilled by the fact that baby is on the stomach. Praise, laugh, get all thrilled, and chances are that baby will think its a good thing after all. A great tool if the baby is still undecided about how this stomach thing is.
3. Join your baby. On the floor. Yep. Go ahead, crawl yourself, and he may get some ideas.
4. Use toys and stuff. Your baby may not even seem to notice them, but they have. Babies are smart and quite curious about stuff. He may not seem to show interest initially, but leave him quiet for a bit, and he'll get all curious about the toy and want to get it. This needs crawling of course.
5. Acknowledge efforts. Really, praise everything, even if baby has feet in the air. If he feels good about trying rather than feeling burdned by expectations he doesn't understand, chances are that he's going to want to spend time investigating this new experience.
6. Interpret - interpret everything as success.. If baby waves hands and feet, he's going to end up moving in some direction or the other - fabulous. Cheer!

Use firm surfaces. A soft fluffy something is only going to bunch and absorb all baby's efforts and discourage him.

Leave arms and feet (particularly) bare and cover torso. This will give more grip to the parts that will push, and more slipperiness to the parts that will slide and make movement easier. Basically, what we are doing is simply creating an opportunity for the baby to discover that moving his limbs on the floor ends up moving his body. Once he gets that, start reorganizing your home to get rid of all baby-non-proof things at floor level.....

Baby Signing Time

Okay, so I'm on a roll with educational resources for babies. Another absolutely awesome resource dropped into my lap last week. A friend with a grown up baby gave me the first episode of - Its Baby Signing Time!

The idea being that babies develop an awareness about their needs and desires long before they are able to express them. Thus, babies often cry out of frustration, because they are unable to get their needs met.

Teaching them the baby (read very basic) version of sign language empowers them to communicate more fluently with you, thus removing much of the stress of guesswork for both of you.

There is an additional bonus - research shows that children who gesture a lot learn to speak early and develop better mental abilities.

There are supposed to be four episodes, though I've seen only one. What we saw, we liked. Nisarg was entranced with the lively music and bright colours. I was entranced with how clearly and charmingly the whole thing has been created. Its literally lessons on sign language woven with music, words, and plenty of practice time. I had never imagined that learning could look so much like a fun video. Nisarg doesn't understand anything at all, but approves anyway, if his stare and waving limbs are to go by.

He's still young, but in a month or so, I guess we'll have all the episodes.

Really, sign language is not just for deaf and dumb children, but for all children who are not able to speak - babies qualify.

Tips on teaching a baby to clap

Oooookay, I think we have cracked the clap code (though not actually clapped), which if you consider that Nisarg is not even 3 months yet, is pretty amazing.

The little guy has figured out that its all about swinging his hands together, but doesn't yet have the co-ordination to quite make them meet....

If you want to teach your baby to clap, and he just stares back and blows spit bubbles at you, the following tips might help:

1. Don't hurry. ENJOY the fun you are having with baby, no matter what it ends up as. Babies sense you enjoying yourself, and it tempts them to enter the action you are leading.
2. Pick your time. Don't just pester the poor darling morning and night. The idea is to find a time when baby is alert, awake and quiet.
3. Talk baby talk with your baby. Get his attention. You want him really looking at you, observing.
4. Clap with an exaggerated movement (with an obvious swing of your hands). Laugh and share the joke with baby and do more baby talk.
5. Do this a couple of times, and baby will likely get buzzed enough to wave his hands. Get all excited about that, and clap some more and wait, as though you are fully expecting him to do the same. If baby doesn't respond, fine. Do something else. Repeating clapping a couple of times, or playfully clapping his hands together will work as interactive fun, but don't turn it into a lesson. It will not make him clap, if he stops enjoying it.
   

This is it. The whole session. Praise whatever swings baby makes, and clap in response. Eventually, the little darling is going to figure out how to make the hands meet when he swings them.

Right brain development in infants

There is a wealth of information on right brain development in infants and how it can't be started early enough and resources and all that. Like any other obsessed mother out there, I'm researching ways to entertain him in a manner that stimulates his development, and so far am doing pretty much exactly what came instinctively anyway.

Talking a lot to him, teasing him to win those smiles, carrying him around and showing stuff, making funny faces and exaggerated actions, etc.

The funny part is that the actions get him looking all solemn and puzzled at me when I'd have thought he'd laugh. He looks like he wants to ask "Hey, you okay? You seemed fine a minute ago"

What I'm planning to do:

1. Flash cards. He still sleeps most of the time, and seems supremely uninterested in the flashcards most of the time. So I guess this is going to be an acquired taste. At the moment, he'll look at the cards very briefly and mostly look at my face as though trying to figure out what in the world I'm trying to do.
2. Touch: He gets his massage and bath every day, and we often cuddle at bedtime. Other than that, he loves touch in general. Stroke his head, body, face-but-NOT-nose, and he's virtually purring. I give him lots of other stuff to touch too - the plastic of his toys - hard, soft, bags..., rubber mat, soft cotton swaddling cloth, other cloth materials, sponge, wood, .... whatever we can lay our hands on
3. Smell: So far, we like a couple of perfumes and sneeze at frying smells from the kitchen. Vicks , milk and baby powder are at the top.
   
4. Movement: I carry him around in my arms, in a sling.... lift him high, dance with him in my arms, ... He pretty much enjoys it all indiscriminately
5. Mimicry: I do all kinds of stuff for him to copy. So far we have managed to stick our tongues out (both imitating me and when told), clap (sort of) and blink. He will suck instead of kiss, and we understand the sign for milk (I like to imagine), but can't copy. I guess he's too hungry and small to focus while hungry yet. Thing is, he enjoys all this stuff and is mostly waving arms and feet full power with that undecided half-smile on his face.
6. Music: He likes most music (other than a couple of really loud songs, and Anup Jalota) Favourites being nursery rhymes in Marathi, and Usha Uthups Karadi Rhymes followed closely by Shakti and Ghulam Ali.

And here I am, saying that I don't get to do much because he sleeps so much. I guess its more about being aware of how much we are doing.

Teething before 2 months

Is Nisarg teething?

Everyone I shared this doubt with thinks I'm nuts. For one, he was born early. For another, he's not even two months old yet. Its supposed to begin after four months and supposed to be even later for babies who come early.

Since yesterday, he's been fussy on and off for no apparent reason. I put him down to nap, then he wakes up almost immediately after, except for the night, which so far continues to be blessedly smooth.

He's suddenly started drooling, biting his fingers and sometimes (rarely) sucking his knuckles. I can see two white bits under the gum where his two lower front teeth could come. I can also feel those teeth with my finger, though they are inside.

To me, it really seems like he's teething.

Dayum, this motherhood thing is one thing after another. Seems just yesterday I was complaining about not being able to sleep because of backaches from a huge front. Now, I can sleep very well, but am still exhausted. First the birth, then coming home, breastfeeding every two hours, diarrhoea, gas pains, figuring out pee communication, worrying about his weight gain all through and just as I was celebrating two days of a regular healthy infant, its now this teething thing, or something that seems remarkably like it.

Anyone else had a child that teethed this early? Developmentally, he should be counted a month old or something. He's still very tiny and not on the weight charts for his age at all. I'm just hoping that this doesn't create a setback in his weight gain....

Teaching baby to clap

Okay, let me say that I tried, and he seems to get it, but I have no clue how it happened.

I noticed that he will try and imitate things I do, so I made faces. He will stick his tongue out when I stick mine out. He will stare at my face when I smile with no intention of copying. He will smile when I raise my eyebrows with no movement other than blinking around his eyes...

Another stage in this saga was me trying to teach him to clap. I clapped my hands when he was paying attention, and he gave me one of those intent stares that make it clear he has no plans of doing any such thing. Small claps make him all puzzled, and ones where I move my hands obviously entertain him, but no go on doing it himself.

Until this morning. Raka had to leave really early, so we woke up around 5am. Imagine my surprise to see Nisarg next to me wide awake, and clapping!!!

Well, they were not real claps. Sometimes the hands came to the center at slightly different times, other times he hit his stomach, still other times, he brought his hands together and clasped them tight. However, there was no doubt that he was trying to clap.

I promptly sat in front of him and clapped without a sound to help him see the movement, and his legs got into the fray, kicking into the air with excitement. He tried once more.

And... that's it.

We went back to staring at me while I clapped.

Looks like my guy was trying to clap as a part of playing with his hands and didn't appreciate the distraction of mom teaching something.

Hmmm... so if you're trying to teach your baby to clap, here is what I suggest you do:

Please share in a comment how you managed to do it. :D

Elimination communication at 7 weeks old

Yesterday, I realized that Nisarg cried for a couple of minutes before peeing, and was able to rush him to the wash basin in time to take a diaper free leak quite a few times. I was thrilled, right until before the MIL told me to call up the doctor. Why is it that the baby is crying when he isn't even wet yet? He must be in pain.

There went my joy at having successfully conquered the gas pains a couple of days ago. In a panic, I called up the doctor, who was busy, busy again, and again, till I could have reached throught the phone to yank the receptionist's hair and to tell her that this was an emergency!

Finally, I was able to speak with her, and.... anti-climax. Like so many of my worried calls, this one barely rated a yawn. No, nothing to worry about. Babies do it. He will grow out of it....

Why in the world was everyone acting like this was a bad thing to be concerned about or grown out of?

It looked to me that my baby was telling me clearly that he didn't like being wet, and was crying in anticipation of the upcoming wet, or to tell me, or from fighting the losing battle to prevent the wet.... In any case, it told me that he needed to take a leak and to provide him with appropriate support. Which is good, right? Isn't that the direction to grow in in any case?

He's small. So what? He just doesn't like being wet.

Just to test, I put a disposable diaper on him, like for the night, and he didn't cry for hours. Possibly, because it doesn't let him get uncomfortably wet like the cloth ones. So obviously it wasn't pain from passing urine.

The other mystery got solved in a flash of insight. Why was he telling us so clearly all of a sudden? I realized that he was telling me all through, but what with the gas making him cry all the time, and my own incompetence with understanding him, I didn't realize till the Bonnisan drops cured the gas and thus the overtiredness. Once the clutter was removed, the normal crying for communication remained, making it seem like it started suddenly.

This was further "confirmed" when I woke up from a nap to change his diaper. I knew that I had to change his diaper even before the crying registered fully and I awoke. Indeed, he was about to take a leak. So somewhere, unconsciously, I had learned to recognize his "pee" crying.

Wow!!!! It suddenly makes me feel like I understand him so much better.

Update: So much for my excitement. This is actually a method to train babies to potty :D A reader here, Laurie has shared the following links:

• http://www.TimL.com/ipt
• http://www.pottywhisperer.com

I've read them very briefly, but they seem informative. Looks like Nisarg and I discovered a very good way of learning to toilet train all by ourselves. See, I knew this guy was smart. Thank you Laurie.

Update two: Oops. Looks like "Elimination Communication" is a method too. A friend called it so, and I thought she was just talking about what I was telling her happened with us....

Bonnisan works miracles with gassy infant!!!

Of course I did a whole load of searching on Bonnisan, and then tasted it myself before even showing baby the bottle....

I'd read all kinds of nice things about it, which kind of reassured me, and the taste is nice - similar to gripe water, so initially I didn't know what the doctor's big deal about the whole thing was.

I found out for myself within our first day on the medicine. Two doses in, and the gas pains were audibly lower. Baby was sleeping better, more cheerful and eating more.

We are now into our second day and WOW!!! Nisarg is back to the sweet tempered baby he was before this gas nightmare began. He hasn't pooped all day today after every day since birth being an experience of a constantly pooping bottom. He still has gas, but its much less and he can pass it without going through agony for every fart or spraying poop along with it. His body just seems so limp and relaxed after feedings.

I'd reached the end of my rope with this gas thing, and desperately needed a miracle. Looks like I got one.

If I add my experience with this medicine, with the research I read, I don't know why doctors don't simply prescribe this off the bat, or at least at the first sign of trouble. Its a digestive tonic that does so many things. Just Google it. No point having to suffer through my half baked jargon.

Sensitive parenting

Didn't want to end the day on a sour note, so I just thought to share an awesome site and a must read for all parents. Aware parenting.

The first time I found this site, it was like coming home. Distressed by my mother-in-law's insistence to not pick up the baby all the time it cries, and to let it cry because "its good for the lungs", I was speaking with a friend about how disturbed I was with such an attitude, when she told me about how she disciplines her children by taking away some previlege when they are naughty. This made sense on the surface, but "felt wrong".

Considering that I was pregnant around when this happened, call it hormones, or inexperience, but I was getting increasingly insecure about my ability to raise my upcoming child, as everyone around me assured me that such permissiveness and listening to the child would only end in unruly children. I had no intention of doing any punishing what-so-ever. I had begun fearing that I may have bitten off more than I could chew by planning a child when I was obviously going to wreck its life as I would be unable to give it the kind of guidance it needed. My plan was more about role-modelling than disciplining. The back up plan was "keep living the love I feel, no matter what". What seemed like a good plan when I thought about it was falling to pieces with every bit of advice I got on the subject.

When I read this site, I literally felt like I finally came home, if home is where the heart lies. I didn't disagree with a word in there. It was like the writer simply took my wishes, organized them and wrote them out.

If you have a child, are a caregiver for a child, have a child as a close relative, or have ever interacted with a child, this site, and her books are for you. Its rare to find the insight of emotions we are used to applying to adults applied directly to children. And no, I don't even know the author. This is complete promotion because of conviction.

For that matter, forget children, and simply live these values with anyone you know, and you will transform your life.